Andy Parsons had agreed (while in the pub on that fateful evening) that if I entered in a van, he would be my navigator. I don’t think he expected me to follow through on my word; however he has now learnt the consequence of trying to call my bluff! So the days rolled round to the Friday afternoon, and with my van still full of all the rubbish you would normally empty from a car due to lack of space, we decided to meet an hour early to ‘race prep’ the rally van. This comprised of checking whether it had oil, air in the tyres and emptying everything out to save those crucial kilograms. The plan was to meet the other two OUMF crews (Ding Boston, Tom Maitland and Greg ‘the Pole’ in the TOYO Golf, and Alex McKenzie and Theo Ensbury in Alex’s lowered Mazda MX-5) at the Brookes University campus, ready to drive down together. On the way we had the bright idea of treating the mighty steed to some lovely Shell V-Power performance diesel, just to give her that extra half a horse under the bonnet.

I think when we arrived, Ding was starting to feel the pressure of competition and realised that the mighty van should be taken as some serious opposition, as he was particularly cagey about explaining anything of the rally, refusing to give us a straight answer as to what exactly we do with a ‘code board’ or even knowing how long we should take to do a stage! His mood was not helped by the fact he was last to arrive, the Mazda taking a sneaky route to the start point (the Five Bells pub in Wickham - which serves very good chips and apparently a delightful soup concoction) and the van making a stunning overtaking manoeuvre past the golf on the M4! Upon our start time, neither myself nor Andy knew anything of what to expect.

We raced away from the start (after having to pause to let three cars pass on the main road), wheel-spinning out of the car park then immediately onto a narrow single track lane, where we immediately sped past one of the novice crews and onwards along the narrow, leaf covered lane. Andy was all the while giving junction directions and notifying me of any tight corners or ‘chicanes’. Blink and you missed it…a two or three letter number plate, poking out of the verge on the left hand side. That must be our first code board! We continued along this lane all the way down to a ‘T junction with the A4’, turning right onto this before almost immediately turning right again onto another narrow lane. We shot along this lane before slamming the brake pedal to the floor as at the last minute we saw a time check point! Andy throws his hand out the window along with our score sheet for the marshal, who duly circles our time of arrival. 20:18. Spot on time! This is when we realised that if we wanted to stay on time, it definitely wasn’t a case of toddling around the countryside at 30 mph as was made out by Ding, we would have to drive flat out for the entire route! So, straight across the crossroads at Hungerford-Newtown and onwards to TC3. TC3 had a diagram written on a piece of paper as it was a complex junction and the route to it was crucial. As we arrived, Andy spotted the distinctive road layout and pointed out to me the way we should go;  turn left then immediately down to 2nd gear for a tight right then a tight left into the checkpoint, clipping all the apexes nicely.  Again, perfect on time, with all our code boards collected. By no means an easy thing to do as we couldn’t go any faster! Immediately left towards the small village of Chilton Foliat where we were supposed to take a right turn. Oh dear - the road was recently closed for night repairs!

As there was clearly no chance of passing the road works we swung left then backed into a side road to discuss the next course of action. Shortly after parking up, we saw the Silver Ford Puma poke its nose around the corner and confront the same blockage we had come across seconds earlier. They quickly decided they would see if they could pass, and weaving between a few cones they were through! Not many more seconds passed before they were driving back towards us being chased by one of the workmen! Clearly this was not an option. Next we saw the MX-5 appear. Alex manoeuvred the car alongside us and asked what we were going to do. I duly gave him no useful advice (there’s no time for friends when racing!) and he and Theo shot down the road to take the long way around the road works. Next round the corner was Ding, Tom and Greg ‘the Pole’ in the OUMF prepared Toyo Golf. Ding also pulled alongside, and when I asked what they were going to do, he was every bit as useful as a thorn in the foot. No more than I deserved I guess!

We were keen to stay ahead of Ding on the road, so we made a quick decision to shoot back along the way we had come - along the shortest route to the next checkpoint. We overshot the first turning whilst following closely behind the Puma, but fortunately dived down the second - as they overshot it and sped to the next checkpoint. Upon arrival we had lost 3 minutes on time, got none of the code boards and arrived from the wrong direction. (However this was to be of no consequence as this stretch was later excluded from the results!) Not knowing this we fought the whole rally to try to make up the lost time. Despite a few hairy moments and some thrills and fights with other cars including both the Golf and the Puma powering past the gutless (but brilliant) van up one hill, we managed to only lose a further two minutes over the whole rally! These were mostly lost on a particularly wicked bend where my instructions were to turn 90 degrees right. The van aquaplaned on a puddle just as I was about to start braking. This meant my braking was too late! We locked up (even with ABS!) for what seemed like ages, while not slowing down. I tried to turn into the corner but all I could see was the hedge approaching fast, there seemed no way of us making the corner!  At the last second I cranked the steering left, off the crest of the road and down onto a tiny gravel farm track. We skidded to a halt, reversed around and wheel span away, all in one swift movement! Everything was still in slow motion at this point and Andy was convinced he had died and gone to heaven. ‘I just farted, but I don’t think anything came out’, was all he had to say.

Upon our arrival back at the pub at the end, only minutes after the Golf, everyone had stories to tell and all thought their drive was the most heroic and their experiences were the most exciting. However I (and you now) know that no-one could top mine of course!! After around 20 minutes of waiting and coming down from the adrenaline high, Theo came racing through the door, with the Mazda’s score card. He was followed by a drained looking Alex – and I wondered if it was the concentration, or Theo’s navigation that had worn him out! He looked as bad as I felt! Two hours of unrelenting concentration really does focus the mind. I was a similar feeling to that when you finish an exam and have been working things out for a few hours solid. A drink was in order! An incredibly stiff coca-cola (remembering I still had the half hour drive home!) was soon followed by the announcing of the results in reverse order. Alex and Theo finished a credible 8th place on their very first rally, despite what sounds like a few excursions and a fair amount of time lost on their ‘long way round’ route at the road works.  With every passing crew, myself and Andy were becoming more and more convinced that our score card had been lost! 7th, 6th, 5th, 4th, 3rd place were announced and it was just Ding’s ‘OUMF’ crew and the mighty van crusaders remaining! 2nd place was ours, on also our first road rally event! We were, as they say,’ well chuffed’ with that (and extremely grateful to the Dolphin MC and all the marshals who helped to make it such a great night out). I think Ding was almost worried he’d been beaten by the van for a few moments! So congratulations to Ding, Tom and Greg on their victory by a measly 3 points! All I can say is just wait until next time Ding!

You swine!

Jimmy Allen

As Snetterton is the other side of the country from OUMF’s base in Kidlington, the team travelled to the historic Norfolk circuit the night before the race. Arriving shortly after nightfall, there was much consternation about how to secure a tent in a tarmac paddock; this was remedied by a trip to the pub for dinner which was followed by a teamwork and coordination exercise as the team attempted to erect the large 8 man tent, kindly provided by Charlotte King. Amazingly, everyone managed to erect the tent without sending errant tent poles through car windows, although a fair amount of noise was generated, much to the joy of Shaun of CCK, who was quick to point out the early start involved for all tomorrow....

Race day dawned at 6am with an autumnal chill in the air; the first order of the day was to pack away the small ‘tent city’ before standard pre-scrutineering checks were made and the transponder was fitted, once again kindly lent to OUMF by Anthony Binnington. The only hiccup was when the car had a little trouble starting; this was quickly traced to what was thought to be loose/poorly fitting battery terminal. Apart from this scrutineering passed without many issues, with only minor requests such as the requirement to lock wire the filler cap and the need to adjust the seat attachments.

Back at our paddock base the regular pre-session spanner check was carried out on the car whilst the scrutineering issues were addressed. Particular attention was paid to the brakes, with extra care taken to make sure they were adjusted correctly after issues earlier on in the season. With the car fuelled and the tyre pressures set, it was soon time for the qualifying session at 9am.

With another bumper HRDC grid, qualifying was the usual close affair, with almost 30 cars fighting and jostling for a clear lap on Snetterton’s twisty ‘300’ layout. After 25 minutes, the Riley’s grid position of 22nd overall and 6th in class (out of 8) was a good reward and everyone on the team looked towards a solid race.  The post-session inspection and debrief only revealed a couple of problems; a minor vibration in the cockpit, and a loosening of the rear support lock nut on the panhard rod. A thorough spanner check and investigation was carried out on the front half of the car to try and identify the source of the vibration, but nothing untoward was found. The panhard rod issue was caused by the bolt hole having been worn into an oval over time, as identified at Brands Hatch; due to the tight summer schedule, there had not been time to replace the mounting point and this work was scheduled to occur during the winter off-season. Everything was re-tightened with Loctite added on the panhard rod. The car was prepped, cleaned, fuelled and ready for action by 11am, giving the team time to catch a bite of lunch - prior to some pit stop practice before the race.

So everyone was rather surprised when the Touring Greats grid was called almost 45 minutes early. Lunch was cut short, and Ding was swiftly bundled into his racing gear. With a few minutes to reach the collection area in time, the Riley wouldn’t have much time to get up to operating temperature, but this would turn out to be the least of our problems.

Remember the problems with starting the Riley earlier in the day? This was in fact symptomatic of a  much more critical issue... As time ticked away, frantic efforts were made to try and start the car, with Kalman, Tom Maitland and  James Manners all bringing their considerable electrical skills to bear on the problem, but to no avail. The sound of racing engines swarming in the background on the formation lap only served to heighten the sense of urgency, but a broken circuit could not be identified. A frantic final effort saw the OUMF team push the car the length of the paddock in a vain attempt to push start the stricken Riley; life could not be breathed into her. As the green light lit up and the final Touring Greats race of the season roared into life, the thunderous soundtrack only served to confirm that the start had been missed and our days racing was over almost before it began. A collective feeling of dejection gave way to the need to carry on; further investigations continued into the electrical maladies whilst the rest of the team packed our temporary base away.

 The good has to be tempered with the unfortunate in racing, this time was no different.  Unforeseeable and terminal battery failure was the cause of our troubles. No one to was to blame, it was just one of those “racing things”.

However, our efforts had not gone unnoticed. In an act of generous consolation, Julius Thurgood very kindly extended an invitation to the team to the final HRDC Allstars event to held at Donington Park the next weekend, along with presenting the team with the ‘Piston Broke’ award. It went a long way to lifting our spirits!

Greatest thanks go to ‘le Patron’ – Julius – for his generous encouragement of the next generation of historic enthusiasts, and to all our supporters and those in the HRDC paddock who helped and sympathised with our plight. Another great day in spite of everything, and crowned by Julius extending his kind invitation to OUMF to contest the HRDC series again in 2014 with our new Riley 1.5 racer project. So a very exciting season to come…

After Saturday’s prep, packing and barbeque at the HQ, Sunday began with the team meeting at 7am, ready to depart for Silverstone. With Jamie Higgins very kindly driving half the team there (after a serious night and no sleep), on arrival at the circuit, we unpacked the van, set up our pit area smack in the middle of the HRDC paddock, and started the car to check everything over before heading to Scrutineering. Tom Maitland and Kalman Strohmayer noticed when the car was started that the engine wasn’t firing on all cylinders, and number three seemed the major culprit. A change of spark plug, HT lead and distributor cap eventually led to the diagnosis of a bent needle in one of the carburettors, which Graham from CCK and then Tom straightened out as best they could, checking it by rolling it on a flat surface of Grahams toolbox! Dom Norman and Kei Takemura-James swapped the front and rear tyres to equalise wear from the last race and the car went to Scrutineering, which it passed without a single issue.

Ding managed to get out for the last nine laps of practice and we qualified 33rd out of 36 cars – many of which, like Aston Martin Project 214, and Bill Shepherd’s enormous Ford Galaxie, were extremely quick. However, when he came back he told us he wasn’t happy with the brakes so Ahron Bequart, Theo Ensbury and Tom adjusted and bled them to try and solve the issue. Meanwhile, Andy Parsons and Kalman tightened all of the roll cage bolts to address a loud bang/noise that Ding had heard in practice. A quick trip around the paddock confirmed that everything was improved.

Dom, Andy and Kei washed and polished the whole car and did a full spanner check underneath to get it ready to race. Other than that, the list of work to be done was much shorter than the first race of the season so we were able to walk around the paddock, talk to other competitors and have a look at the cars we’d be up against. This included a thorough examination of the Bonham’s Riley 1.5 we hope to be competing against with our new racing Riley.

As the race approached, we started the car to get it up to temperature and do a final check to make sure everything was working. Ding went to the collection area and the rest of the team went to the pit wall for the race start. All of the cars got away without incident and Ding settled into his usual rhythm while we watched the action from the pits. Silverstone is well known for having wildlife in and around the track, and a local hare decided that it wanted to get a bit closer to the action. A little to close in fact, as shown by the blood and hair we found on the side of the car when it came back in...

Ding spent the whole race chasing down the Triumph Vitesse that was heading our class. On lap 15, he finally caught the Vitesse and passed it going into Beckets, thereby becoming Class leader! Unfortunately, on accelerating down the following straight, he noticed that the car was suddenly sluggish, accompanied by a high pitched tinkling sound – and immediately dipped the clutch, hit the main isolator switch, coasted down the straight and turned off the track at the BRDC stand. All gauges read normal, but in order to avoid making the problem any worse, he left the car where it was, and returned to the paddock. When we noticed that the car had stopped coming round, we returned to our pit too and Ding explained what had happened.

After collecting the car and pushing it back, we quickly identified a missing pin from the bonnet hinge as one possible source of the rattling noise. The lack of power, however, seemed a bit more serious. A compression test revealed that we had virtually no compression in cylinders 3 and 4, but as there was no oil in the water, or vici versa, we suspected that the fire ring on the head gasket had gone between the two cylinders. As this is the same area the head gasket blew at the last race, we were worried that the head might be warped - so this would need very close inspection in the next few days to find the problem and fix it so the car is bullet-proof for the next big HRDC race at Oulton Park on May 11th.

Despite being denied what might have been our first class win, the whole team had a brilliant day out and would like to thank Julius Thurgood for allowing us to race in his great series and gain such excellent experience - as well as a seemingly endless list of other sponsors who made the day possible.

So we head to Oulton Park in just over two weeks time with high hopes, as it’s a track which should suit the OUMF Riley well - provided of course that we can get the head gasket issue solved in time!

Andy Parsons

Ding picked me up from Slade Park at around 18:20 for the drive to Abingdon to pick up top navigator Zip Zerihan en route. A couple of speedy overtaking manoeuvres later we arrived at the Tesco service station in Abingdon. Once we met up with Zip and filled up with petrol, Ding obviously needed his rally supplies - Jaffa cakes – supplemented on this occasion by a couple of bags of Biltong (due to my persuasive personality). As we sped towards Newbury, Zip told us about his exciting current projects – new offices, wind tunnel testing Indy cars, and more – and about 20 min later we arrived at the pub in Enborne where the Dolphin Motor Clubs rally organisation was in full swing. Once there Zip and Ding completed the necessary registration forms, and being given the choice to either to compete in the novice or expert class, Zip decided to have go at the expert class. However, a couple of comments from Ding later (reminding Zip about Paul Hardy’s historical penchant for unusually testing clues), we decided to go at novice instead. (I think maybe the decisive comment was “you have a better chance at winning as a Novice” from one of the organisers).  A quick coffee and a coke later, we listened carefully to the driver’s briefing. We were informed there were no black spots on the map and that there were no speeding cameras on route, but there were a number of decoy code boards planted ‘off route’ i.e. along the wrong routes.

Getting ready in the car at around 19:55, we got everything into place to be flagged away as car 6 at 20:06. Everything got off to a positive start with Zip swiftly decoding the clues, and Ding enjoying the surefooted R1R tyres in the damp and leaf-strewn lanes. However, by Time Control 4 the clues were becoming a bit more complicated, and we had to park up on the side of the road for Zip to correctly navigate us trough the narrow and twisty roads of Berkshire. Shortly after a square left after TC 6, we were accelerating hard when we saw something unusual in the headlights amid the colourful carpet of leaves spread across the tarmac about 100 metres in front of the car.  Ding quickly swerved left as we identified the unknown mass to be a large tawny owl just sitting in the middle of the road looking toward the powerful light beams being projected from the Golf. An owl playing chicken? It didn’t move a muscle; just glared at us as we sped past…

A couple of minutes later Zip mentioned he was beginning to feel rather uncomfortable. The serious concentration on the maps required by the unusual complication of the clues was getting to him. Ding adjusted his driving to ‘slower and smoother’ and we continued on with windows open, while collecting every code board we saw. At the end of the section we came round a corner and saw the board marking the next control point on a grassy triangle at a junction - just in front of the time control marshals. As we swerved left through the first opening, we realised that this was probably the wrong approach – and that we were supposed to be entering the control by going the long way round the triangle. Diving right to try and avoid entering the control, we span round – over the triangle? (it all happened so fast its difficult to remember!) - and backtracked for about 200 metres until we found a gateway to turn again. This time we entered the control the right way – and in a much more orderly fashion – but as we stopped at the marshal we found it was none other than Paul Hardy himself! He had observed our desperate attempt to save the situation, but as the organiser of the event, he had also noted it as being a possible infraction of the route. From this point of high drama, things did begin to slow down a bit as Zip – while extremely reluctant to admit it - was getting seriously struck by ‘mal de mer’.  Clues were taking longer to decipher and the tempo was slightly decreased as Zip lost the feeling in his fingers and found himself speaking as if he had just left the dentist! Ding was feeling both guilty and very sympathetic about Zip’s condition, so he opened his window fully. This, added to Zip’s window already being fully open, did not aid in me feeling any better as there was now a decent draught in the back of the Golf. But the wind-chill was certainly going to keep me wide awake and vigilant for more code boards! In spite of all this distraction, we only suffered minor complications which necessitated reversing up a couple of times to regain the correct route. Suggestions to Zip that we might stop and give him some time for to recover were bravely turned down out of hand; he was adamant that he would continue and persevere regardless of his nauseous condition. To our great collective relief, we finally found our way to the last Time Control at around 22:20 – which was conveniently located back at the pub (Belgian rally organisers should take note of this fact).

We climbed out of the Golf, and I have to say, I have never seen a man physically shake from feeling sick. Zip’s face lacked any colour, his speech was slurred, and his fingers so numb that Ding had had to help him open the envelopes containing the clues at the last two controls. This was a truly impressive performance, as he did not once ask to slow down or stop during the rally – and in spite of the way he felt, he had somehow managed not to actually be sick.  Once out of the car and into the pub, he began to warm up and recover quickly – as the rest of his crew enjoyed a quick cigarette and a couple of drinks to pass the time as the results were being calculated. We were pleased that the wet weather forecast had not been accurate – as it hadn’t rained at all – but as a result, it hadn’t really given us a proper chance to test the TOYO R1R’s – so there’s a further treat in store!

After about 20 min the results were declared and we joined the rest of the crews for the prize-giving. Unbelievably we were informed we finished in 8th place. A couple of minutes were added to our time due to late arrivals at TC’s and the picking up of one decoy code board, but this was hardly surprising given prevailing conditions in the Golf - which under other circumstances, and with a less stalwart navigator - might have led to our early retirement. Let Zip’s extraordinarily stoic performance be an example to us all, as it embodies the OUMF ‘never say die’ spirit. We had an amazing time (well, maybe not Zip!) - and a timely reminder that the fun of competition is as much about participating as it is about winning.

On the way home, Ding appeared to want to take a quick detour to South Wales for some reason - but was dissuaded – and we ended up back in the Tescos in Abingdon to drop Zip off at his car. I am happy to say that by this time he was back to his usual super-enthusiastic self. Hero!

Ahron Becquart